#42

Alright so I have around one and a half hour left until 2018. So here I am, in my room and completely procrastinating on studying and writing a blog post instead. Kids, make me your idol, please, I am very good at time management, kids.

So anyway, since 2017 is ending I decided to write this last post for 2017, to wrap up the whole 2017 journey. Where should I start?

On January 2017, I was still doing my foundation in Dengkil and tbh, I don’t really enjoy Dengkil that much. It was hell; mentally draining and I didn’t interact that much with people around me. I went to class, went back to my room and I went back home every week. How I miss going back home every week. If I could turn back time, I would be more active in Dengkil, maybe join a few clubs here and there and organize a few events instead of going back home every weekend. Maybe I focus on studying instead of complaining how much I dread in Science and how much I wanted to pursue in TESL instead. But anyways, I had a few good friends that I treasure; thank you for making my foundation life bearable.

Moving on to my life after foundation – I worked part-time at Petrosains. It was fun, like, legit fun. I finally have guy friends after a while. I mean, you know how I have no guy friends at all when I was in SGS and when I was in Dengkil I only have 5 guys in my class and I only talked to one or two if I needed anything. So, anyways, Petrosains was fun. I spent a lot of time with Syaf, and made several friends there and tolerated bitchy attitudes from visitors from all over the world. Yeap. Ah! And I had the opportunity to perform for Volunteer Appreciation Day in Petrosains.

Aaaaaaaaand, I’m currently in Sarawak, precisely in UNIMAS for my Bachelor Degree. I think it’s pretty much the highlight of 2017, I thought that I would give up halfway through the first semester and beg my parents to enroll me in some private universities in Kuala Lumpur. But here I am, weeping in my room as I contemplate should I change my major or should I just go with the flow. I’m hoping that these 3 years pass by fast and I can finally graduate.

Things that I learned throughout 2017 would be; keeping my circle small. It was never my forte to go around and make friends, it’s not that I’m that much of an introvert but it’s just that I like my circle small. I’m more content with this small circle that keeps me happy and motivated to keep going. Woots! I haven’t joined anything yet for this first semester but I assure you guys that I will be back performing on the stage starting next semester. Be it dancing or theatre, I don’t really mind.

2018 resolution? Pretty much the same thing every year.

•  Trying to lose weight since I’m fat and flabby
•  Try to socialize with people in UNIMAS and maybe making my circle a tad bit bigger
•  Try to learn Sarawak language.  gdi, istg it is so hard to understand some words especially is there are talking in other dialects than the normal Melayu Sarawak. eg: Iban, Bidayuh etc.
•  Should I join netball again? But I have low stamina and high fat, though.
• Please, please, please be awarded dean list. I never had the opportunity back in Dengkil.
• Try to manage my time wisely
• Try and get a scholarship so that I don’t have to use my parents’ money. I feel so guilty having to buy flight tickets using their money, but then if I don’t use their money I won’t be coming back since I’m broke af.
•  Live happily and contented with whatever I’m facing with my small group of friends. Hiks.
• Write more stories!

And I guess, that’s just it. May 2018 bring us happiness? Or whatever you want, meh. Whatever.
p/s: I've deleted Sweater Weather from my blog. But! I've posted it on my asianfanfiction account. If you want to read it, it's there with several other stories, on-going stories.

#41

             I’ve been contemplating whether I should write about this or should I just keep it with me. It’s been bugging me and I just can’t see why it’s a big deal. Maybe it was my fault, but then everyone is different. Aren’t we all?

“That’s so rude”

            A screeching voice suddenly interrupted the class. I was paying attention to the talk given in front of the class the whole time. Of course I was shocked. What happened? I saw the lecturer walking in fast pace towards me and my friends at the back. I gave signals to my friends to put down their phone. This one particular lecturer really despise anyone who uses our phones during class, like, legit, she would go insane if she saw anyone using their phone.

            Unfortunately for me, sitting at the end of the line. She stopped right beside me. I wasn’t scared or anything. I mean, I wasn’t doing anything wrong, or did I? She snatched away my phone that I put on the right side of the desk and started lecturing about how rude it was to put our phone on the desk during class.

Wait what?

            Perplexed. I stared at her, trying to figure out, how it is wrong? I wasn’t even playing with my phone. I was listening to the talk given by pelajar tokoh fss 2017, who just graduated a few days ago. I was taking mental notes of her ways of studying and everything. Of course she did said that she never used her phone during class, I didn’t too. I only use it if I want to refer to notes online or if I ever wanted to google anything.

            This is absurd.  I told myself as the lecturer keep on talking about my ‘rudeness’ I was staring at her in disbelief and my friends were giving me eye contact, almost as if saying they were sorry. They were the ones who used their ones during class, but since I was sitting on the furthest side and she could only snatched my phone instead of theirs. I didn’t mind though, I thought that yeah okay she is just using me for example. Ok.

“Ni yang membezakan awak dengan pelajar dean list yang tengah bagi talk dekat depan. Dia baru bagitau that she ut her phone on silent mode and but it inside her bag, not on her desk. That’s why she’s a dean list student. And seeing the way you’re putting your phone on the desk, Nampak sangat you’re not paying attention. Macam mana nak Berjaya in life? See, she’s brought up by her parents who are professionals, that’s why she has great attitude unlike yours.”

            That’s when I realized, this lecturer, has gone too far. Just because the girl’s parents are specialized doctor and a lawyer. Being brought up by professionals, doesn’t mean that my parents or anyone’s parents did a bad job in raising us. Everyone is different, everyone view life and things their doing differently. Everyone have their norms, and ideology of their own, to know what’s wrong and what’s right. Everyone is different and yet, this lecturer, who obviously know how society work, since she is a lecturer of social science, who should know and understand how human socialized, how human thinks and all those related.

            My parents did a great job in raising me up, even though they were busy. If I did anything wrong, blame it on me. I was the one who decided to act like so. Not my parents, and it’s not due to how they brought me up. The thing that irked me the most would be how she said I’m not going to succeed in life. Who are you to foresee my future? Even if I’m sitting at the back, doesn’t mean I have no intention on studying well in university. My parents had sent me so far away from home, far away from my comfort zone, far away from my friends, I no longer have access to go around KL on weekends as I pleased. Yet, you’re talking shit about how I have no wawasan and semangat untuk belajar.

            You should just tell us to put away our phones and not talk about how our parents brought us up and how our future is without knowing how well I’m doing in class for the time being. How I’ve been doing pretty well, having high scores for quizzes, yet you’re confidently letting your outburst of rage and spurring things you have no power of knowing.

            I never really like this lecturer since the first class, and I’ve had enough. I still need to attend her classes in order for me to pass this subject. She even rejected our opinions when she’s obviously asked for them. During discussion, we were giving out opinions and laughing at the random ideas that popped out of someone’s mind, and being the strict ass lecturer she is, she told us to shut up and be serious, don’t laugh and whatnot. And, I’ve always thought softskill would be the most anticipated class throughout the whole semester. But she prove me wrong. I don’t understand how she is soo rigid, you’re teaching softskill for God’s sake, it was supposedly be a chill and relaxing class. But I guess, that’s not the case.

#40

This is something that I've wanted to write since forever but my procrastinating kept on forgetting this trip deserve a blog post. 

Back in July, we went to PD. Just us. DCL comeback katanya. lol. Anyways it was fun we swim a lot, eat a lot and as usual, we gossiped a lot. you know how girls are. Its been months and everyone is in their own college, no one is in the same university, but of course, except for me and Mira. We are stuck together and we're gonna grow old together.

But hey, if you guys are reading this, I miss you guys and I can't wait for our next trip together. Syadni kata we're going to Johor? See you guys soon.

Love, 

qeeute yang natural beauty

#39

Here's nothing much going on in live. I sleep late, woke up late.

I was watching some movies and then it hit me - I'm going to degree in a few weeks! That's nut!

How can a little girl like me (okay, no need to emphasize that I'm not small in terms of age and size), go through degree in a few weeks and to make it worse, they're sending me to Sarawak. What in the world was I even thinking. 

And to make it even worse, it's not the course that I've always wanted. It's that one particular course that I said to myself as I was choosing for 12 choices, "Eh, what the heck, I'll just put this to fill it the choices, I won't get this ever." 

So, that's karma for you, girl. 

I've been contemplating whether or not to go that far for my degree. It's for 4 years for god's sake! 

I've built up courage and gathered strength from people around me, telling me that they believe I'll be just find, telling me I'll do well, telling me 4 years is not too long (okay but seriously wth)

The thought of being to far away from my family makes me shudder. Never in my life has I ever been more than 70km away from home. The furthest I've been was in Seremban for 2 years. Now that I'll be going to Sarawak fro 4 years, completing my degree in the course that I have no idea how I'm going to make myself like it, I seriously messed up. But I believe God has planned my journey for better. So I shall do whatever it takes, to survive that far.

I keep thinking to make an appeal, but I thought about how poorly I did on my finals and to be able to get a place for degree, I should be thankful and go with it. 4 years. I'll come back in 4 years, graduating with honor. 

I'm going to miss Kuala Lumpur, I'm going to miss KLCC. But I'll be fine. Pray for me. My heart goes to my friends who haven't yet gotten accepted in any Universities, I know you guys will do well, just pray and stay positive. 

Till then, bye.

#38

I'm not friendly and I have no plan to be one. Someone I just met in Petrosains said I was friendly, I wasn't impressed, I know I'm not one. 

I find it hard to make friends and to just casually lepak with anyone I just met. I don't like it, I feel anxious. Whenever a guy started to approach me and be all friendly I would thought that it was maybe a bet they did with their friends. Did I developed a new phobia? I guess I did. 

When someone called me Qin instead of Syiqin or Qee, it felt weird and a tad bit uncomfortable. I get it, Syiqin might be too long or Qin sounds cuter than Syiqin. But the only ones who called me Qin is my family and close friends; Kinah, Alia, Adenn, Iman, Fatin, Lala, Yana. 

It's not that I don't want them to call me Qin, it's just that the name brings the sense of affections and closeness that I thought the name itself is special. But so many started calling me Qin to the point I'm giving up on the special nickname and I'm letting them call me whatever they want. Call me sayang or yours while you're at it.

#37

“A woman who doesn't wear perfume has no future.”
― Coco Chanel

I won't go anywhere without wearing perfume. I always have a mini perfume in my bag no matter where I go. Essential. Almost as important as my life. Eh, takdalah, drama sangat tu.

But I'm really particular about smell. Thus, the obsession on perfumes, body mist, body lotion, shower gels and what else? Whatever smells good. I dig it.

So as for today, I'm going to write about fragrance.

“A woman's perfume tells more about her than her handwriting. ”
― Christian Dior

We'll buy perfumes according to our preference and that will tell about herself. Why is that so? There's soft smell, strong, sexy, fresh, musky, spicy the range is wide.

I'm more of the fruity kind of person, but recently I've develop new preference; musky.

Here's the list of my favorite fragrant:

#1 The Body Shop White Musk.

So here's the very common perfume for ladies. This is my new favorite, my brother bought it for me as early birthday present. hihi.

I find this smells like a beautiful crisp, fresh musk - very clean and quite light for a mush which is refreshing and not heavy like musk perfumes can sometimes be. Soft Floral, Crisp - Musk The Body Shop White Musk Eau De Toilette is a soft scent. It has top notes of musk, lily, ylang ylang with hints of galbanum and basil. It has middle notes of musk, jasmine, lily and rose and base notes of musk, jasmine, rose, iris, amber, patchouli, vetiver with hints of peach, oakmoss and vanilla.

It smells very feminine and I don't know how to describe it, but it just smells amazing! Must have!

 #2 Victoria’s Secret Pink Wild At Heart Body Mist

It smells so clean, fresh, and feminine.  I make it a point to spray it always when I go out and get compliments from even strangers. Also, the body mist has aloe conditioner, which is very good for the skin. The best part is that it has a very delicate touch of scent which is not at all strong, it’s very delicate and soothing.The scent is composed of red passion fruit and sheer musk, giving an adventurous, lively, playful, and girly sense. It seemed to almost be too sweet for me in the beginning, but as most other fragrances, once it is aired out it is simply delightful.

I like the packaging too. It's sheer pink and gives out the feminine and youthful vibe.

#3 Victoria's Secret Secret Charm Body Mist

An irresistible, fresh fragrance. Enchant in Secret Charm, a bright bouquet of fresh honeysuckle captivated by calming soft jasmine. Experience the luxury of fragrance. Refreshing formula is infused with conditioning aloe vera and chamomile. Spray on for a sexy touch of scent.

In my personal point of view, this one gives out very fresh smell and idek but since it's a body mist so it doesn't stays long. After a few hours the smell has disappeared and you need to reapply it every now and then to get the long lasting smell. But, it's the combination of fresh and floral smell.

This is my perfumes, for now. I'm thinking of selling some of these because I need to get some new perfumes for myself. But tbvh I'm gonna stick with the white musk for awhile.

My actually love of my life is Victoria's Secret Mango Temptation. I've been using that since 2011. But sadly it's hard to get it, everytime I went to VS it'll be out of stock. But, seriously, it smells amazing! I used to use it everyday and everyone knows how I smell. Even if I stand behind someone and they could smell my perfume, they'll know it's me.

But yeah, it's okay. I'll use white musk for a long time until everyone know it's me from afar.

Another one of my favorite would be Ralph by Ralphy Lauren, it smells quite strong, but fresh. CK One Shock, fresh and quite fruity smell, suitable for teenangers.

For body mist, I couldn't leave out Bath and Body Work. I love love love love Velvet Sugar! But they don't have it anymore! It smells sweet af istg so sweet! I loooooove the smell so much! Warm Vanilla also smells good. But I only use these sweet fragrance before I went to sleep. (ikr, who tf would waste their perfumes for bed? me)

oooookay, that's all. I need to go to work tomorrow. So, bye!

#36

I've been spending my holiday by watching a lot of things on the internet. Recently, I've been watching 'Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners', which I think a pretty entertaining TV show. heh.

So, it started out when I saw Iman Azman's posted about this shows on her instagram and I thought 'hey, why not'. 

So, yeah, I've watching it diligently , not kidding. It's fun. I mean, seeing how opposite kind of people interacting to make things work. Yalls better watch it. So anyways, the show is about these very very obsessive cleaners who spends approximately around 6 hours daily to clean their house. First of all, when I heard, I was like, ok who would have that much time to clean their house daily and yet again, daily, everyday? I would spend 6 hours even weekly.

But yes, these obsessive compulsive cleaners, literally spend 6 hours or more to clean their house and they also used up around 10 bottles to bleach cleaners weekly. It was said that they have the urge to scrub every inch of their house to avoid any germs living on it and they just want their toilet to be clean af so that they can drink water from their toilet bowl. I'm not kidding, they actually did.

They also wouldn't let anyone to use their toilet, saying that they would bring all kind of germs. istg, their toilets are so clean and sparkly. Most of them are OCD diagnosed, and that's why they are doing things repeatedly until it's perfect. 

The saddest part is that, these people who are claimed as OCC (Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners) are pretty stressed out about how much money they're spending for bleachers and how less time they're spending their times with their family, mostly said, their children. Some of them claimed that cleaning is therapeutic escape for them. But yeah, this too, connects with their mental health that makes them wanting to cleans from the fear of germs and infections. 

So, this TV Show is about the collaboration of these OCC people with their opposite kind of people, who is the ones who never cleans, at all! Their house is a wreck! A total mess, I cannot understand how they could live like that. Most of them don't have any space to sleep because their house is too full with all the crap that they have. Most of them are hoarders who buys a lot of things from charity events, car boot sales or any kind of sales but never cleans. And, it's pretty disgusting, istg. 

So, these OCC people will spend 4 days trying to help and cleans those houses and at the same time challenging themselves to be less of an OCC person and yknow, overcoming their fear because that's just how life are. And seeing that, it shows that everyone is different. The hoarders said that they kept all those craps because it has their own memories, while the OCC guys said throw it away so that you'll have a lot of space and your house will look more minimalist. And somehow after 4 days, the two of them will come to a closure and discuss among them about whats good and whats bad. 

That's just it. My brother told me that I might have OCD, but i doubt that because I never realy like to keep my stuff neat of to check on things frequently. But that one time, I actually sat quietly in the kitchen after our open house during raya celebration, I was diligently separating utensils according to size, design, types and stacking them neatly and wrapping them and putting it nicely in a box. I also arrange my wardrobe according to colors. okay, maybe not really, but I separate black from anything else, for pants, i separate it from track bottom usually for me, I have pants with lines at the side so I fold it and put it so the lines are visible, that's pretty neat. And another thing I do is, I use coloured hangers according to the type of clothes. maroon for pretty baju kurung moden, jubah, kaftan. blue for normal baju kurung, black for cardigans, varsity, sweaters, and everything else is neatly folded. 

Another thing is I fold my clothes as neatly as possible. I hate how my mom fold my clothes because she's more of the 'asal lipat sudah lah' and I'm more of the 'kena lipat elok elok and all must be in same size'. And in Dengkil, I do spend most of my time cleaning the house because most of them just never really cared of cleaning the house and it's frustrating to see how dirty the toilet is, to see the rubbish all piled up with not a single person willing to throw it out. So. Frus. Trat. Ing

Last, but not the least, I have sensitive sense of smelling. I hate when anything smells bad, be it a human, a room, or anything. If it smells bad and you're on my black list. And I don't understand why people smells bad, especially if their clothes smells 'kepam' like, okay, if my clothes, ever, smells 'kepam' I'd throw it in the washer again! 

And, if you're saying that that person smells bad because the person is a bit on the chubby side. Well, my brothers and I are pretty much on the chubby side but we, undeniably, smells so good you'd want to cuddle us 24/7. And please, take care of your hygiene, and don't wear the same thing for a week, that's just, a total no-no. Wear perfumes, body mist, use deodorant. Don't forget to shave. And just take a good long bath to eliminate all those icky smells.

adios.

#35

Okay so it's almost 12 AM and here I am on my bed, I just finished doing my mathematics tutorial and now I'm thinking of how the foundation is going to end and I'm actually getting all sad and gloomy. 

I mean, how am I not? In a month, foundation will end, and I'm back with being at home doing nothing, well of course I'm planning to work. But yeah, that's not the point here, what I'm going to say is that I'm sad, it's going to end. That this hectic crazy life is ending, I don't have to stay up until late night and wake up early for class, I don't have to stress over lab reports, assignments, quizzes, all those shitty things that we've been through here. But hey, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 

Okay, my main point is actually, I'm going to miss my friends. Everyone, from my classmates and housemates and friends since SGS that I won't be seeing that frequently anymore. God, I'm so sad to leave them but I'm happy to leave foundation (basically I'm quitting science bye yalls).

Okay okay okay, so starting from this semester, I guess I've been quite fond of a few of my classmates and yeah, I love them, I guess? I don't even know how to put it in words but they actually meant a lot to me than I expected them to be. From all of our inside jokes and gossips to crushes here and there, to food sharing and everything. Leaving Dengkil means leaving behind all the great memories behind and keeping them save in the deepest pit of my heart. I met a lot of amazing people here, I'm amazed of how fond we are to each other and how much we knew of each other. 

I remember the first day we met, I was not that happy to see none of my SGS clans are in the same class. But hey look at us now! heheh. Anyways, here's to the few favorite girls in the class that kept me sane throughout the classes you girls are the real mvp, no jokes. 

To Aina, Qama, Sab, Azreen, Fahimah, Khilwa, Asmaa, Qaqa, Aseela, Neno, Fildzah, (my mains here heheheheheheh)

wow, I cannot imagine life after foundation without you annoying bunch,

Siapa nak menyahut everyone I shouted "Siapa nak makanan jerit hey!!" in class or anywhere.

Siapa nak gelak at my hambar jokes and my actually very lawak jokes.

Siapa nak dengar cerita sendu sedih duka lara, cerita mengarut with no ends, and cerita cerita lain.

Siapa nak tell me to stop talking because I'm annoying?

Siapa nak get annoyed with the faces I made when you're talking with me.

Hah, siapa dik, siapa. Ko boleh jawab ke. Hah. 

Nonetheless, thank you for being mah friends yalls dah bombs okay see yalls later I hope you guys never bring this up in class. It's cringe worthy istg. I hope yalls actually read this after asasi ends. I don't want to write this after asasi ends because this tu I dah tak sendu because I;m happy being at home but now I'm all sad and homesick and I love you guys okay. now ciao. 

#34

So, this post will be dedicated to the friends I made throughout my days in CFS UiTM Dengkil.

Where should I start. 

I guess, I should start with my housemates? Although, they wouldn't read this anyways. Who cares.

First and foremost, each and everyone of them were actually scared of me at first because they said that I look scary and very garang. Which, after a while, they found out that I was the totes opposite. hihi. What I would always wanted to say to these people is that, I'm so grateful to have them as a part of my journey in life. Thank God, I don't have any weirdos as my housemates or I would go nuts. 

We usually have these weird late night talks about our future, our own political point of views, how we felt, our crushes and others. I cherish them, especially since everyone likes to share food. Which, I have soft spot for food, so a plus point for them. Thank you for waking me up every morning and making me realize I need to study, for giving me support when I have so many things to do. For making me feel better every now and then. 

p/s: thank you for lending me tutorials because I'm just lazy af. huhu

Now, I should move to my classmates. I am only close with a few of them and I have no plans on being nice to others. lol, I am not even sorry though. 

So me being me, I only talk to the ones I like and ignore the other. loljk, mana ada, I actually talk to everyone it's just I tend to me attached to few. During the first semester, I was close with Qama, Neno and Fildzah the most. We somehow ended up doing everything together, be it studying, presentation or even eating during lunch or dinner. We talked about a lot of things and for the second sem my group of friends has finally expanded. Thank God, I'm not that introvert much. (since when was I ever)

These people has been the main reason of my sanity throughout the semester. and also, few of them are the reason of my purse nipis every week. But then, thank you for being my dates going here and there for good food. The ones who listen to my lovestruck moments everyday (especially masa tengah practice flashmob hm)

The ones I'm close with are the one who would pergi makan dekat anjung during one hour breaks and the ones yang turun anjung eventhough it was raining heavily to watch my flashmob. The ones who are very loud in class. The ones who understand my jokes and layan I eventhough tak lawak and I'm very annoying. and the most important one is, the ones yang share their food with me. hihihihihi.

For some unknown reasons, we would be seated nearly during lectures or tutorials and we would pass our food among us (basically since we understand how sleepy we are during class) and these people are the ones who knows about my heartbreak (the one I had already overcame, don't worry I okay jewpz)

I cannot imagine how it's going to be after foundation ends, and we won't meet each other anymore and we won't be in the same university (but then if anyone ended up in same university as me during degree, you know I'll cling onto you, just saying) 

We only have 6 weeks together, and we'll go our own ways. It's saddening how attached I've grew to you guys for this 2 semester and everything we've been through together. The hectic weeks, the never ending lectures, the replacement classes at night, the 3 tutorials in a day, the 3 lab report a week and everything. Hey, you guys made my foundation life memorable and at least I'm staying sane. 

p/s: let's stay sane for the last 6 weeks and be friends until we grow old because u girls are my fambam.

Okay not to forget my mains from SGS, eventhough we've known each other since SGS tapi dah masuk Dengkil baru nak berkawan. apa benda ntah, I also don't know.

So this one, dedicated to Awin, Zety, Alyssa (Mira dah jadi bae I since SGS so tak payah include)

Anyways, wow these people lah yang jadi sushi date I, pulut mangga date and anjung/palma date throughout foundation. Who could ever imagined us together. I don't even talk to these people dekat SGS dulu. idk what to say, but thank you sebab layan I. lol see u guys in dengkil.

I'm also going to include the ones I know from flashmob eventhough I tak borak dengan diorang pun but I least yelah. saja. suka hati I lah.

#33

Hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi 

So do you guys know that thing everyone's been doing since last year?

The 1 like=1 fact about me/ 1 thoughts or thing like so?

So, yeah, I'm going to it here. Because if I did it on my twitter no one would  like the post sebab I ni beshe beshe je tak famous pun. 

Anyways, it's going to be combination of facts and opinion and whatever shit I'm going to type its pretty much random. 

1. Everyone's first impression of me would be snobbish and a bitch. Due to my unimpressed resting bitch face and my lack of words with new homo sapiens. I tend to chill and observe people and target on who I should talk to. Because, that's just how I do it. I don't just talk to everyone. I talk to the ones I think I could blend well with. So, if I talked to you. You're pretty lucky. Congratulation on being the chosen ones. 

2. I don't talk much. Only the first few hours after we met. And then you'd be the one who would tell me to shut the hell up. I'm not talkative around my family members especially with my parents, might due to their absence while I was growing up? I don't know. I grew up mostly with my bibik, my mom would go to work early in the morning and come back at night. My dad works in Seremban and he would only be back during the weekends and by then, he's too tired to play with me. Me and my brother have large age gaps so it's pretty awkward. Me and my cousins, too, have large age gap. Thus, I go around and make friends with a lot of people. 

3. I'm pretty clingy and annoying. Like, sooooo annoying. I make ugly faces and just weird faces when someone is trying to talk to me. I make weird noises 24/7. I'll make you tell me that I'm cute. I'll make you feed me. I'll make you accompany me to the toilet. I'll make you sick of me but you could never hate me because I am that irresistible. 

4. I fall in love very quickly and I fall out of love quickly too. So there's this one time my housemate did this personality test on love on me. And yeah, it was stated there, even in the damned personality test that I fall in and out of love quickly. And this is the main reason why my friends need to calm and listen to my "OMG he is sooo heart eyes emoji" every now and then. I'm afraid of falling too deeply in love. I'm amazed how people decides to get married. I mean, how do they know, that person is the one? What if the feeling is temporary? What if it was yet, another bet? Ha, camana tu. 

5. I have this very dark and gloomy sight of my future since my parents wanted me to pursue in science but they actually forgotten that I'm pretty stupid in science and I don't like it since primary school. My brothers told me it's okay to take English/Business Administration as long as I like what I'm doing. My brothers told me to choose between passion and interest. Which narrowed down to English and Psychology. But hey, have I ever said that my parents are actually against both of that. Well yeah, that's why I'm suffering this 2 Semester doing Science. When everyone I met thought that I was a TESL student. I know. 

6. I have no specific genre of music that I listen to. It ranges from Akim & The Majistreet (I taktau how its spelled) to Panic! at the Disco to Pierce the Veil to Avenged Sevenfold to Ed Sheeran to Ariana Grande to Nicki Minaj to Eminem to Kpop (sebenarnya more to kpop) 

7. I like to go food hunting (plus a little shopping) So that's why I would go out with someone who wouldn't mind spending extra money for food. Because, I obviously wouldn't mind going to a pricey place for good food. Because good food=happy tummy. 

8. I'm against those yizlumik people who is discriminating others about:

• Tak pakai tudung tapi solat, haram
• Main pokemon go, haram
• Starbucks haram
• Poligami itu sunnah

As you can see, I am not that yizlumik and I have my own opinions on things like this. I find it funny how they could go around saying that hot dog is haram because the word dog. But you could go around and smoke and when someone said rokok is haram you go nuts and said there's no hadis saying rokok is haram. Funny how triggered this yizlumik people looking and the cross, saying that we should use the letter t because it resembles the cross.

9. I have very short term memory. So, you guys could come to me and tell me yous secrets mainly since I will forget it in a span of 5 minutes. 

10. I stan a lot of girls group. I don't like BTS (no hate though, I just don't understand the hype). The reason I prefer girls group is, I don't know, no reasons, their songs are ultimate bop. Girl crush everywhere. Why do you need oppa when you can have unnies who makes your heart flutters (koreanboos sangat)

12. I would love to go and travel around the Malaysia (sebab takde duit nak pergi overseas) with my friends. Tak kisah drive or naik flight I just wanted to go places and try a lot of food and take a lot of nice pictures together. yes yes. The first one on the list would be Penang (my love)

13. I'm actually scared of the opposite sex. I would go to a different kedai in anjung sebab I don't want to be in places crowded with boys. 

14. I have a lot of perfumes. Everyone said that we shouldn't have that much of perfume because a perfume should be significant or something. Like if anyone smell it, they would be reminded by you. But, yeah, so far I have tons of it and recently my sister-in-law just gave me a new one. Yayezz

15. I once cried at school in front of the teachers before Permai's birthday party because the cake hasn't arrived yet and I was scared if it won't be there on time. Yes, very emotional. 

16. I didn't really planned to join the dance club during my days in SGS but I did. and trust me, it was worth it. 

17. When my brother got married, I actually got sad, like very sad since I won't be the one they would prioritize anymore and now that they have their own kids, it makes me realized that I'm okay, they took care of their kids exactly like how they treated me (a lot more kinder kot) but yeah, I'm cool

18. My brother told me to find a guy that respect me even before we are in a relation, when we are in a relationship. Because, if that guy didn't respect me even before we're married, how do I expect that guy to treat me right? 

19. I am against being fair is pretty. I think all shades of skin in pretty in their own ways. I mean, gurl, you have extra melanin to protect you from the UV gurl, rock your shades gurl. And also, I am against skinny is pretty. (basically since I gave up on my diet, again) I love curves. But I tired looking for tops in size M and bottom in L or XL. Do you even know the struggles to look for the ready made baju kurung for my size? If I buy it in M, I wouldn't fit the bottom. If I buy it in L, the top would be very loose but the butt it cute and hugs my butt. 

Okay, how long am I supposed to write again? I don't know. I'm going to continue

20. I treasure my friends a lot. Believe me, even if we're not talking anymore I still cherish every moment we shared together back then when we used to talk all day everyday. I love you people. I like to talk about weird things most of the time, but usually, nowadays, I would talk about life. Like how it's going to be in few years time. What I'm going to do in my life after foundation. Which course should I take. I ask around and you know, just listen to other's opinion. I like doing that. 

21. I get pretty proud when my friends got awed by my fork&spoon skills especially kalau nak kopek kulit udang. gila pro okay. I would like to say thank you to pengawas dm (dal) yang selalu marah masa makan beradab dulu siap suruh berdiri or tutup kipas sebab semua makan bising sangat. Thanks to SGS, my fork&spoon skills are pretty neat. very prim and proper gitu. 

22. I would randomly dance to a song (kalau I ada mood) my housemates find it amusing how I couldn't keep still even a minute. I find it amusing how still I could be if I'm laying on my bed and doing nothing. Like, very still, the only thing I was doing is breathing.

23. Okay, this one is for Aina. She wanted me to write how to handle boys. Wow the irony, I don't even talk to guys, but, haih, nevermind. How to Handle Boys 101 by Syiqin Rusli: 

#1 Do not ever, EVER trust them that easily. Don't get your hopes up too high, you're just giving them the chance to break your heart. They have their own ways to play with words, and you'll fell for it.

#2 Act as if you are not interested and see how far they'd go for you

#3 Don't be those jealous girlfriends who would be mad if the boys talked to another girls, let them live. They're not your husbands pun. 

#4 Be friendly and smile. Don't worry, you're not flirting but its just an act of politeness. uhuhuhu

#5 If you have a boyfriend, treat them right, you jangan nak harapkan dia je bagi you surprise presents semua, habistu you punya duit buat apa? surprise lah dia pulak, make him happy. kalau your boyfriend boleh bagi you a bouquet of flowers or makeup. buy him what he likes too. 

24. I do wear makeups but in small amount and I only wear foundation and lipstick, I wear eyeliners occasionally if I'm in the mood to. I have a lot of lipsticks mostly in pink. Different shades of pink. It's cute. I bought Sephora's Give Me Some Lips, miniature lip kit but it hasn't arrived yet. I'm still waiting, come one Sephora! So anyways, it's a kit of Marcs Jacob, Kat Von D, Sephora, Nudestix and idk I don't remember. (I'll do a post on that, don't worry).

25. I can bake well. I can't cook though. My cookies are the bomb! My cupcakes, cakes, kek batik and pretty much everything is da bomb! But I can't cook. At all. I could only help my mom in the kitchen but I never cooked anything by myself except for maggi, nuggets and nasi goreng. I will learn how to cook before getting married. Jangan risau future husband, you won't eat pasir.

26. I get scared pretty easily. From all the horror movies I've watched, nothing beats Pontianak Harum Sundal Malam for me. That's just the scariest shit I've watched my entire life. I still get scared every once in a while if anyone reminds me of any of the scene in the movie. I would cry. istg, I cried. 

So anyways, I'm going to stop at 26. Because my brithday is on 26th of May. (save the date and buy me some gift okay)